Apendix A

The old man was sitting quietly in the park, listening to the birds sing and watching the children play. A short ways away he noticed an old friend, one he hadn't talked to in quite some time. It was a young man. The young man was walking hand in hand with a lovely young lady and they both apeared to be quite interested in one another, but out of the corner of the eye the young man noticed the older man away on the bench.

The young man led the girl by the hand to greet his friend, the old man.

"Sir, it's been a long time, how are you keeping up?"

Happy for the conversation the old man replied, "I'm quite all right, but who is this lovely young gal you're holding so sweetly?"

Beaming with excitment the young man let go of the girls hand long enough that she might shake with the old man as the young man introduced her, "This is my fiancé."

The old man remembered the conversation he'd had with his friend some time ago, "So you found LOVE, have you? Pleased to meet you."

She shook his hand and then quickly looked at her watch, "I suppose we really should be going."

Now the young man knew that they weren't in any kind of a hurry, and thus saw no reason to rush off when they had just started talking with the old man. "We have time, dear. I would love to sit and talk for a moment."

At this the young lady became a little upset, "Take your time, I'll be in the car when you're done." She quickly stormed off towards the car.

Feeling a little sheepish the young man apologized and began to hurry after the girl, but the old man stopped him, "Young man, won't you talk with me just for a short moment. I feel that I need to tell you some things." Confused, as the young man usually was when he began a conversation with the old man he turned.

The old man took on a weak smile, "Do you recall the last time we talked, you were wondering about LOVE. I vividly recall telling you that the one you LOVE is the one you would do anything for, correct?"

"Certainly, I've taken that to heart."

"I see, perhaps my explination was lacking."

Now the young man was more confused than he'd ever been and the old man could clearly see it so he decided to just keep the conversation short and jump strait into it, "When you do something for your love, what is your purpose?"

"Well, to make her happy of coarse."

"Yes, but are you making her happy at that moment, or are you helping her to be happy for eternity?"

This struck the young man deeply. He was lost for words as this simple revelation came to him. Love was not something that only effected the now, it also meant forever. As the old man stood to depart from the young man he gave one last bit of advise to be pondered over, "It's never important to give her the world just because she wants it, but it is vital to give her help because she needs it."

Just Like I Told You Before

"How do you know when you love someone?" he asked.

The old man stopped for a moment and looked at the young man, "Well, that all depends, what kind of love are you speaking about?"

The young man replied honestly "Is there really a difference?"

"Hmm, well put. But, it seems to me that you already understand, so why are you asking me?"

"Because I'm . . . I'm confused."

After a thoughtful moment the old man got a bit of a twinkle in his eye, "How do you know when YOU love someone?"

"I care for them. I want them to be happy, to have what ever it may be that they might need, and I want to help them get it."

The old man quite agreed, but was now confused himself, "So, what don't you understand?"

Trying to make it clearer the young man put forth, "Part of what I'm wondering about, I suppose, is that . . . IS there a difference in loves? --kinds of love I mean."

"What exactly are you getting at, son?"

The young man finally decided to give the old man the whole picture, "I love her. I love her deeply. But I know that she isn't the one I want to be with for the rest of my life, at least she isn't that person right now. I don't know if she'll ever be. How can I say that I love her, but still feel that way inside?"

With the clearer picture the old man tried to explain, "I'm sure you do love her. You'd do anything you could to make her happy. But don't think that just because you love someone it means that you owe them anything." He finished this little bit with a smile and it dumbfounded the young man.

Finally after giving the young man some time to process this comment, and being sure that he didn't understand, the old man continued, "While LOVE is the same, it is important to realize that there are different, say, levels of love. There are things that I would do for my wife even before she'd finished asking me to do it. I LOVE my wife. I have many neighbors that I love, some more than others, but I would not make certain sacrafices of myself for them like I would for my wife. That love between her and I is far stronger. You may love this girl, but you don't LOVE this girl. Only to the one that you LOVE should you truly tie yourself to."

Some silence passed between the two friends and the young man began to speak again, "But-"

The old man quickly silenced him, "When you would be willing to do more for her than anybody else on this planet."

When Nothing is Said and Done

I'm tired, but my legs won't stop running.